“Affleck you were the bomb in Phantoms, Yo!” – Jay

31 01 2012

No line resonates stardom like a complement screamed from an adoring fan running from security on your movie set.  Further more if this fan is the one and only Jay, from Jay and Silent Bob.  “Affleck you were the bomb in Phantoms, Yo!” is the only reason I would have ever thought to watch Phantoms.  If Jay liked Ben’s performance, then I probably would too.  Phantoms arrived on this planet in 1998 with the hopes of being this generations “Blob”.  Of course the movie was destined to race through theaters to arrive on HBO and DVD, but Affleck’s performance I must say was divine.  Ben lands his marks and acts the shit out of this movie.  Not even giant face eating moths or dark oozing masses that travel through sewage pipes could slow Ben down.  I believe this is when he hit his stride, well until Reindeer Games, and Gigli…well and Surviving Christmas.  But hey, he was the bomb in Phantoms!

Burke





“Parents” Was Almost Too Weird, Even For Me…

28 01 2012

Last night we had a last minute Movie Night so I decided to snag “Parents” off of the Netflix instant que.  The synopsis of a young kid living in the 1950’s who thinks his parents are cannibals sounded really strange and intriguing.  So naturally we were all for it…after 14 hours and a good nights sleep I still don’t know what to think about it.

Released in 1989, directed by Bob Balaban, who I think is known more for his acting than for his directing, went for an all out art film direction.  “Parents” is filmed very well and continues to make you feel uneasy and creeped out with what’s taking place throughout the film.  Randy Quaid, who plays the father, surpasses the art direction taken by the film as a key piece in this creepy puzzle.  I’m not going to spoil anything else for you because I would like you to take a moment and watch it.  It’s not a terrible movie, it’s not the best thing you’ll see in your life, it’s just a movie that you need to experience. 

Burke

 





Goin’ Campin? Tucker & Dale vs Evil

19 01 2012

It is my pleasure to introduce to you, the latest camp/cult classic, Tucker & Dale vs Evil.  These two well mannered rednecks just want to fish and hunt at their newly purchased vacation house.  The only problem is there’s evil in dem woods…and college kids keep dying around them.  Blood, gore and laughter abounds.  I know, it really sounds sick and twisted combining gore with laughter, it actually sounds borderline psychotic, but the feeling of the movie, while being suspense ridden at times, is really quite light hearted. 

Tucker & Dale vs Evil hit store shelves December 9th of 2011 and has been picking up substantial speed as a cult classic.  With recognizable characters, above average acting (for a camp slasher), creative deaths and a hilarious plot it’s no mystery why Tucker & Dale is popular.  In fact, watch it now instantly on Netflix or run down to wherever it is you kids buy DVD’s and pick it up.  You won’t be disappointed.

And I wouldn’t leave you guys to watch it without a drinking game to go with it.  Grab a group of friends or get socially-unhealthy-drunk alone.

Tucker & Dale vs Evil drinking game:

  • Anytime someone dies. *DRINK*
  • Anytime Allison gets knocked unconscious. *DRINK*
  • Anytime Dale is socially awkward. *DRINK*
  • Anytime a beer is cracked open. *DRINK*
  • Anytime the names “Tucker” or “Dale” are said.  *DRINK*

Well have fun with that one kidos, it’s one of my favorites of 2011.  Ring in the new year with a new classic.

Burke





Don’t Miss “Attack the Block”

13 01 2012

Horror and Sci-Fi fans rejoice, Attack the Block is here and apparently I’m just now finding out about it.  Attack the Block was released here in the states on October 25th of last year and if you missed it then, I suggest you watch it now. 

Attack the Block is about a gang of teenagers who manage to kill an alien that crash lands right in front of them.  After gloating about their kill, they’re soon met by more wolf like alien reinforcements.  Action and mayhem ensues.

Attack the Block is a refreshing take on the alien genre.  The aliens look amazing and don’t scream CGI, classic stunts and superb special effects make Attack the Block a unique experience you don’t get in this “Green Screen” era. 

Attack the Block has a wonderful cast of characters who’s personalities mesh extremely well together.  The british slang is humerous and is pretty easy to understand, adding a great deal to the “Block” feel.  This is their block and they’re going to do whatever it takes to defend it…or defend themselves.

I won’t even suggest this movie to just horror or sci-fi fans, Attack the Block is an all around great movie, I suggest that everyone see it.  Do not miss it.

Burke

 

 

 





Return of the Killer Tomatoes Movie Night

10 12 2011

Last nights winner of our Lucky Movie of the Night was Return of the Killer Tomatoes.  RotKT barely beat out the horror movie House by the small margin of one vote on our Facebook page.  So really only one person voted, but we have Julie to thank for voting for RotKT because it ended up being a  pleasure and a half. 

Return of the Killer Tomatoes is the sequal to the 1978 possible cult classic, Attack of the Killer Tomatoes.  Arriving conveniently 10 years after Attack, Return has the fiendish Professor Gangreen up to no good, creating beautiful vixens and oiled up body builder henchmen out of tomatoes.  As you can probably perceive on your own *SPOILER* his plans are ultimately foiled by meddling teenagers.  But don’t let it’s 42% on Rotten Tomatoes and strangely a 4.2 on IMDB fool you, Return of the Killer Tomatoes is a brilliant B-Movie and deserves rightful cult status.  Return knows it’s not an oscar winning drama and it flaunts it.  Constantly breaking the fourth wall, a la Mel Brooks, and even achnowledging it’s use of one actor to play multiple parts.  Just add a mustache and voila, brand new character.  Amusingly enough you actual only get to see “killer tomatoes” when they show literally 15 minutes of footafe from Attack of the Killer Tomatoes.  Every other “killer tomato” has already been transformed into mindless musclebound guards.  Above everything else, Return is a fun flick to watch and share drinks with a group of your closest friends…or if you’re lucky enough, under the stars in a car at the drive-in.

Speaking of drinks with friends, here’s a little drinking game we came up with for Return of the Killer Tomatoes:

Return of the Killer Tomatoes Drinking Game

  • Every time someone growls. *Drink*
  • Everytime they break the fourth wall (talk to the camera). *Drink* 
  • Product placement. *Drink* You’ll know it when you see it.

And if you want to get super crazy, *Drink* everytime “Tomato” or “Tomatoes” is said.  Enjoy!

nerdfarm





The Warrior’s Way

28 11 2011

If ever there was the perfect blend of cowboys and ninjas, The Warriors Way does it astoundingly well. A fugitive assassin, the best of the best, on the run and wanted by his own clan for an act of treason; He refused to kill the last surviving member of their rival clan, an infant girl. The hero dodges would-be killers on his way out of the country seeking refuge in a fictional wild west style town, and home of a traveling circus of misfits. But this town has its own closet dwelling skeletons in the form of a marauding band of ex-patriots, thugs and thieves, who yearly pillage the town and ritualistically rape and murder its citizens.

I felt this movie, albeit semi cheesy, handles the subject matter very well. The fight scenes made you think “Damn! Ninja be deadly!” You can’t see any wires, and the fighting lacks the rhythm of most Kung Fu flicks, where you can basically time all the strikes. There are high flying assassins, damsels in distress, flame blowing clowns and a carouse wheel sniper! I mean how can you go wrong. Everything you want in a ninja flick, nearly nothing you don’t. There is however a love story thrown in for the ladies, but fellas this one will NOT disappoint.  Get the pizza ready.

Srsbizniz





Nothing like naked rage dancing through graves.

16 10 2011

Released August 16, 1985

Last night I attended Maximum Comics Midnight Movie at Rave theater here in glamorous Las Vegas, Nevada.  They were gracious enough to feature one of my favorite zombie flicks, The Return of the Living Dead.  This was my first time attending the Midnight Movies and came in with zero expectations.  I just knew I wanted to see The Return of the Living Dead on the big screen.  Maximum Comics encouraged costumes, but since I didn’t know if they meant regular costumes or zombie costumes, I opted to roll out with jeans and my Han Solo shot first shirt.  I arrived early, around 11:10, observed a few people mingling out front, wandered past the ticket counter, and gave my Free ticket to the usher standing guard.  He nonchalantly pointed me the direction of theater 4 and I meandered over to the concessions to support the theater that just gave me a free movie.  $14.50 later and a gigantic popcorn I couldn’t possibly finish, I headed into the theater.  I was greeted by Jay in a Popeye costume and immediately wished I would have donned my Zissou Cadet uniform.  But sadly it was too late, so I picked my normal middle/middle seat and started munching on my popcorn preparing for the 40 minute wait until the movie started.  I liked the sense of community Maximum Comics promoted, everyone was nice, enthusiastic, promoting upcoming magic shows, giving away free comics, informing all the nerd females about Very Awesome Girls LV, and just showing a genuine love for Las Vegas.  It was very similar to the values we here at Nerd Farm strive for, all nerds welcome, no nerds left behind type attitude.  I truly believed that motto until the whole row behind me filled up with this annoying “sychotics” (?) group that reminded me a lot of white trash ICP juggilos.  One in particular caught my eyes and ear holes attention,  an early twenties shorter skinny white male with a black t shirt that read “I ❤ White Chicks” was holding a booster seat and coming to sit right behind me.  I could only be so lucky.  And lucky for you I managed to note many of his self proclaimed funny quotes.

  • “I have my booster seat!” this general statement was repeated many times to each person who came to sit in their row, I stopped counting at six.
  • “I just wanted to see if I could get stuck.” was his rebuttal to questions regarding the booster.
  • “My butt didn’t get stuck, but my wallet did.”  I don’t even know what that means.

Hey, it's the Thing!

The next few nuggets need an explanation before I show you the quotes.  As you walked into the theater you were given a plastic hollow ball that contained a cute little tiny body.  You closed the head over the body and voila, super hero…or villain. Well these little trouble makers set the tone of balls (the ugliest part of the male genitalia) jokes for the rest of the night.  That in combination with the earlier V.A.G. (Very Awesome Girls LV) fueled a dangerous bad joke concoction that grew stale very early into the movie.  But I digress, let us continue with the balls joke this gentleman couldn’t get enough of.

  • “Did you drop your balls?”
  • “Did my blue balls drop?”
  • “You got Buzz?  I want Buzz for my Woody.”  Essential insert any ball joke here and you nailed the complete conversation before, after and during the movie.  I’m pretty sure I even heard balls in anus somewhere in the mix.  Classy bunch I know.

Prior to the movie they gave away prizes for their favorite costumes.  There were no categories, or judges, just costumes they enjoyed for some reason or another.  My favorite part about it was the titles they gave for each winner: Late coming Dracula (because he arrived a little late), Fat Green Lantern, and Contacts  Zombie.

The Return of the Living Dead is my favorite zombie film of the 80’s, even more than Day of the Dead.  Blasphemy you say?  I think not.  TRotLD is the complete package.  It has punk teenagers, boobies, bad ass music, talking zombies, government waste, nuclear bombs, numerous one liners, plenty of gore, and it was made in the 80’s.  Hell, that makes it almost one of the greatest movies of all time with all that good shit crammed into one movie.  With the movie rolling and taking in the atmosphere I lightly pretended I was back in 1985 watching the film at the local cineplex.  Imagining it was still midnight, but I was watching it for the third time that week because I enjoyed it so much and couldn’t wait the year and a half for it to come out on VHS.  Needless to say I really enjoyed my time at the movie.  Maximum Comics and Rave have combined forces to make something unique and special.  Where else can you go, converse with complete strangers and yell profanities at the movie screen without getting tossed out of the theater?  I’m hoping the next movie scheduled for Nov. 5th will be as legendary as this was.

BRAINS!

The Return of the Living Dead Drinking Game

  • Anytime the word “Brains” is said. *drink*
  • Anytime a zombie talks. *drink*
  • Anytime you see boobies. *drink*
  • Anytime delicious brains are dined upon. *drink*
  • Anytime a zombie is battered by any weapon. *drink*

I couldn’t let you out of here without a drinking game for this zombie masterpiece.   As if you needed an excuse to enjoy this classic even more, now you have a game to go with it.

Check them out at maximumcomics.com